Can boys play dress up?

I am an education major and I am doing my practicum in a daycare full of sixteen four- to five-year olds. A couple of days into it, I began to understand the differences in interaction, language, and activities between boys and girls. The girls like to play mommy and baby and the boys play “good guys bad guys” during dramatic play. I remember from this class looking at the different toys, clothes, and books, which are placed into categories for boys or girls. However, should there be this distinction of what boys can play with or what girls can play with when they are younger.
Two weeks later, I was observing a boy dressing up boys clothes and enjoying it. However, the teacher told me that he used to dress up in girls clothes. I did not and still don’t, think there is anything wrong with boys dressing up in girl’s clothes. Apparently, the change from dresses to hats and suit jackets was from the influence of his father. His father did not like the fact that he was dressing up in girl’s clothes because maybe he thought he would turn out to be gay. I think that young boys and girls should experiment and explore different activities, clothes, games, because they do not know the difference. Children should not be forced into the gender norms or society by their parents or guardians, children should be able to choose where they fit in with society or in this case, their classmates.

The Missing Vagina Monologue

The article “The Missing Vagina Monologue and Beyond” by Esther Morris explains how she was missing a vagina when she was born and her feelings were not taken into consideration.

MRKH syndrome is when you are born without a vagina. Although many women are born with a vagina, Morris was not. This article compares with reproductive choice. Morris was faced with this rare syndrome at a young age and because she was so young, she did not have the opportunity to make her own choices. The doctors insisted that she have her vagina reconstructed for sexual reasons, even though her insides where hurting her. She should have had the choice of whether she wanted to have a vagina. Another shocking discovery was the fact that the doctors did not tell her about the side effects of having MRKH. Like reproductive choice, society should hold a broader view on MRKH in order to socially and emotionally understand what these women go through when they are diagnosed with it. Also, there are possible gender roles that could be assigned to women who do not have normal sexual activity because of the lack of their vagina. I believe that doctors should take into consideration women’s choices on what they want to do with their body. They should also realize that the body parts are not what distinguish gender. Overall, women should have the right to choose what they want done to their body when dealing with MRKH for the sake of reproduction in the future.

Reproductive Choice

Reproductive choice is the right to choose whether or not one should conceive a child or not. However, there are ways that feminists can better explain this definition. Feminists should think about whom or what is that shapes reproductive choice. There are many choices that women can make on the basis of reproduction.
Medicalization is a key component that women should have the opportunity to choose. For example, women should have a better opportunity to sample birth control pills when they are ready. If more young women were aware of the use of birth control as a way to potentially not get pregnant, there could be less young women getting abortions. All women should have an equal opportunity to access contraceptives.
Women should have a better opportunity to access health care in a safe and affordable way. Feminists should explain how women should have a stronger voice in expressing their opinion because they are the one’s carrying the baby. Women should also have better sterilization practices so they are not forced into unsanitary practices. If society understood the definition of reproductive choice broader, they would understand that women should be the one’s who have the right to choose. What this means is that women not only choose abortion rights, but rights concerning their health and the health of their baby. Also, society could offer better healthcare for young or single women. On the other hand, better explaining this definition may cause political controversies. Society may believe that the government would then be held responsible for the monies that some mothers would lack. Others may view mothers as being irresponsible or actually practicing abortion because of the usage of birth control. There will always be issues and controversies regarding reproductive choice and who should be able to make decisions.

Poor Simulation

Statistics show that there are more women that experience a low-income situations then men. The reason for this is because most women are single mothers who do not receive child support from their ex-husbands. I believe the girls who were picked to be the mother, probably did not know how to act at first. The mothers were probably more worried about taking care of their children and allowing them to have the best life and put less focus on themselves. For example, one mother last her job and decided to get a job at the third night shift because it paid more. This would also mean that she did not spend anytime with her daughter.
The moms also had to make sure that their bills were paid for first. They also had the opportunity to sell some of their assets to a pawn shop or their car to a used car shop to get more money they may need for that week. It was shocking to know how many different ways a low-income family can survive because of all places that were offered. For instance, a babysitter, pawn shop, loan office, housing office, etc. These different places offer various ways to help low-income women. Women in these households definitely hold a great amount of stress.
It was interesting to see how the women tried everything they could to pay their bills and to maintain a certain amount of money. It is also hard to buy new things when you’re a single mother, and the mother’s knew that they did not look the part compared to higher class women. The women definitely feel stigma because of how they look and how much money they make. They may also feel shame because they have to put their children through the exact same thing they are going through. If the mother’s can afford to buy their children what the other children at school may have, the children may feel shamed which would make the mother’s feel stigma. Also, if the mother’s can not afford for the payments of a car then they would take public transportation which may cause embarrassment. Low-income does cause stigma for the children and especially for the mother because of the guilt she may feel because of the lack of income.

Western Feminists

Whether or not Western feminists should be involved in promoting gender justice in all countries, especially the lesser-developed ones, is a controversy that may never get solved. I feel that Western feminists should be involved in lesser-developed countries because gender inequality and abuse will continue unless something or someone does something about it. During the Fourth World Conference in Beijing, strategies were implemented to decrease gender equality, but we have yet to see much progress. I believe that Western feminists should take action.
Women from around the world are treated in ways that are socially or physically normal to their culture. Some lesser-developed countries believe in infanticide, rape, beatings, or even killing the women. For example, ten years after the Fourth World Conference, Indian men still pursue women from different countries because they believe the wives at home are not housewife material. This evidence of ten years after the declaration and Platform for Action shows that talking about continuing problems does not necessarily mean that they will be fixed.
Western feminists need to explain to the women of other countries the right way to be treated. They should explain the human rights that women should have and describe how women should be treated. Western feminists should be involved because they understand the human rights of women and they have experienced different gender inequalities first hand. It is also important that Western feminists explain the right way that women should be treated because many families from these cultures migrate to the United States. When these families migrate to the United States they bring their beliefs in culture with them, however, their culture practices may be illegal there. There are strategies that should be implemented to overcome the gender inequalities. Just asking governments to change the way they treat women does not work. Action needs to be done and Western feminists should be involved.

LGBT

I figured I would write about the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) panel that came to our class the other day. I thought it was interesting to hear their point of view on how students here at James Madison University view them as members of the LGBT. I really enjoyed the panel because I think it takes a lot of courage to stand up to a group of people who belong to the same community as they do, JMU, and explain to us about how it is hard sometimes being labeled as part of that group.
It was influential to see them stand up for what they believe in. I thought it was surprising to know that when one of the girls went shopping they would be reprimanded for buying boys and girls clothes than for being a lesbian. This relates to our class because not only do women get discriminated against for their gender, but when you are a part of the LGBT club you automatically get the stereotype that you are gay. One of the girls on the panel explained that some gay men or women do not like the label of gay or lesbian. This dislike for labels is due to the fact that some women or men are just starting their coming out process and may still not want to hear that they are gay or lesbian. I thought this was interesting because someone who is not afraid to consider themselves gay may have a sense of worry that comes with the coming out process.
This LGBT really opened my eyes to the measures this group takes in order to get their voices heard. Just like women in the first and second wave of feminism, they have to fight for their rights in society. The group also has to deal with the hardships that may occur when finding a relationship. LGBT groups are usually the minority on campuses or even in a community so it is hard to find someone that fits who they desire. There are many groups who face discrimination, but it is up to those groups and societies willingness to be open to different view points (even if the viewpoints don’t fit the social norms) to allow for such a variety of groups. Groups that do not fit the social norms of society will continue to be made, but those groups should not be discriminated because of their differences.

Privilege

On aspect of my identity that I believe I am privileged is that fact that I am able-bodied. Being able to have a healthy and strong body allows me to participate in activities that I would not be able to if my body was not strong. When I was young I had the ability to participate in sports such as basketball, softball, soccer, lacrosse, and field hockey. Being able to play all of these sports allowed me to go through high school playing field hockey and lacrosse. It also gave me the advantage to play at a division one school.
I am able to have this privilege as part of my identity because I was not diagnosed with any disabilities that some people are. It is also a privilege because people need to be shape or have that tone, healthy body in order to survive in the real world. It is easy for me to get to and from my classes by walking but it may be hard for someone with disabilities to do the same. Having a healthy body also gives me an advantage in obtaining jobs. Though my only jobs have been coaching field hockey camps here at JMU and back home in New Jersey, if I was not able-bodied I would not have been hired to work at these camps. Keeping up with my able-bodied also allows me to maintain a relationship. I am not saying that you have to be perfect to have an attraction for someone, but it gives you an advantage. If I was in an unhealthy state or disabled I would be at a disadvantage to attract a man and I would have low self-esteem about myself. Ultimately, being able-bodied gives me advantages that wouldn’t come if I was disabled.

Romance and Relationships

Growing up I never really understood the meaning of romance or what it meant to be in a relationship. I understood that my mom and dad were married and they loved each other, but I didn’t understand what that meant when I was younger. On the other hand, I believe that my mother was the one who truly taught me about romance and relationships.
Middle school was when I knew what a relationship was but it was the kind of relationship that didn’t really mean much. I would get into relationships in middle school but to me, they were just relationships with friends; they weren’t romantic ones. When I entered high school I was more excited about relationships because I was older. I had my first real relationship when I was a junior with a guy who was a year younger than I was. I believe he shaped my view of a romance and relationships because he was not. My mom told me that in order for me to understand romance I would have to explore it. I started to understand the sexual schemas that are associated with me when I left my first relationship experience. Later, when I was a sophomore in college, I had the opportunity to see many romance incidents and relationships. I began my next relationship at this time and I am still in it today. My mother was the one who told me that relationships will come and go and one day I would stay in one for the rest of my life.
I really look up to my mother because my father and she are high school sweethearts. They act like brother and sister but one can tell by looking at them that they love each other so much. I believe their relationship has taught me about romance and what it should look like. I also feel that they developed their own sexual scripts, guidelines for sexual behavior, through their relationship. I now feel that I have a better understanding of what a romantic relationship should look like.

Thrid Wave Feminism

The characteristics of third wave feminism vary from the first and second wave but also have some similarities involved. One of the main characteristics that this wave represents is individualism. It allows women to represent themselves through writing, thinking, and activism. Most of the issues third wave activists tend to focus on is sexuality and identity. They create consciousness-raising groups to promote issues and create power to society.
Individuality, to third wave feminists, means that whatever matters to you is most important. That is, the subjects and issues you believe in should be your main focus. In regards to power, if you are considered in the lower class of society than your main focus is not on individualism and power or what sexuality and power really mean because of where they stand with society. On the other hand, wealthy activists focused their issues on the characteristics of sexuality and intersectionality. What this meant was that the focus was on inclusion and diversity of women, corporeality (the experience of the body), and reclaiming what they had lost in the past. Another controversial characteristic was the focus of women in the third wave representing “girly” culture. This meant that women would walk around wearing lipstick and high heels but first and second wave feminists saw this as negative. Third wave feminists wanted to recognize themselves as part of a girlie culture because they wanted society to know that there is nothing wrong with being a woman. In addition to the girlie culture of third wavers, there was the importance of the rejection of victim hood. Third wave feminists would talk about women as being survivors instead of victims. Overall these were the main characteristics of third wave feminism and how they approached and embraced their power.

Gender Socialization

Gender socialization is the idea of teaching the right techniques to boys or girls. Boys are taught a different ways than girls, but is this how it should be? Growing up as a girl I played a lot of sports so I liked to hang out with the boys because the girls loved to do “girly” things. This meant that I was treated differently because I was a sporty girl who hung out with the guys, but I considered myself a girly girl. My mother also dressed me up in dresses and skirts. My mother also believed in making us do girly things but made sure to keep us in the sports scene. I have also been influenced my brother and dad to understand masculinity. My brother has always played sports in middle school and all through of high school. My brother also didn’t wear dresses or skirts like I did, he wore ‘masculine’ clothes. My father also raised my brother to be more masculine then feminine. Today, some powerful influences have shaped my conception of masculinity and femininity.
For example, recently Michele Obama became the first lady. She is a classy, well-dressed woman who is knowledgeable and able to raise her children while dealing with other issues. I also believe that women in professional sports shape femininity, like Jennie Finch the pitcher of the USA women’s softball team. She is a beautiful, married woman and also one of the best pitcher’s in softball. There will continue to be influences in today’s society that will shape different ideas of femininity and masculinity.